Babyfather doesn’t want me to attend church

November 30, 2022

Dear Pastor,

I am a 20-year-old girl and I got baptised a year ago. I am trying to live a good life. Before I got baptised, I was living with my boyfriend. He did not want me to go to church.

I told him that I wanted to go to church because I was having visions. This man got me pregnant, but I was not aware of it. He was the one who told me I was pregnant. I felt sick and couldn't go to work and he told me that I was pregnant. I don't want this baby, but he wants the baby, so I am going along with it.

I left home to live with this man because I am from a very poor family and I was sleeping on the same bed with my two brothers. We lived in a one-bedroom house and only a sheet separated our mom's room from ours. Sometimes when my mother and her man were carrying on, we could hear them.

When I got a job and I met this man that I am living with, he asked me to come and live with him. I agreed because I was tired of the condition under which I was living. This guy treats me well. He doesn't allow me to go hungry. The only thing is that he is not in the Christian business. He is more like a Rasta. Since I have got pregnant, I have not gone back to church because I feel guilty and ashamed. My stomach has started to show, but my boss told me that I should continue to come to work.

My boyfriend has already started to choose names for the baby. I would prefer a boy over a girl. I don't want a girl so that she will go through what I have gone through. My boyfriend has a good job and he has been paying the rent. He told me not to fret because one day we will have our own house. That seems far away. My boyfriend is 29 years old. This will be his first child. He said that he doesn't have another woman and I believe him.


Dear V.M.,

I understand what you are going through and I hope that this man with whom you are living will take good care of you. When you met him and he invited you to live with him, you thought that you would be having a much better life. But you have ended up facing a situation that you should not really be having. You got pregnant too soon and your young man doesn't even want you to attend church. I hope that he will change his mind and allow you to go to church. He is by far your senior and he should learn to respect you and to treat you well. Take good care of yourself and let me hear from you again.


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